People are always saying that I am sooo creative.
The problem is that I don’t feel sooo creative most of the time. I suppose this is a human condition. We don’t see what there is, we see what there isn’t. We don’t see what we have, we see what we don’t have. We don’t see what we’ve accomplished, we see what there is yet to do, etcetera, etcetera, yada yada ya.
So what does it feel like to be creative?
What is that buzz we’re all searching for?
I know that when I was young and everything was new, creativity came with a tingly feeling. A sort of trance-like happiness. Time would dissolve.
And now…not so much.
That doesn’t mean I don’t stop trying. I work at it daily. Now, creativity comes with its more cumbersome friends called discipline and practice.
Even when I’m not inspired I still go to my studio and “just do it”. (Yes I have a studio. It’s tiny but it’s there and it’s mine). I don’t want to dismiss this practice because it does bring a certain skill development.
Creative creatures need/have to grow and build their talents…but what about the fun? I’m now hearing the echoes of old art professors saying, “Why do you think they call it art…work”?
So there’s the rub.
How do you uncover that old sparkle you had in your earlier relationship with creativity? In my case painting and drawing. I know some would dismiss me as a big basket case of boring. But I can’t dismiss me. I have to live with me! Im stuck with me for a while. I’ve even tried to stop being an artist for awhile, oh say, twenty years or so. It’s freeing at first, this thing of not being responsible with your gifts and talents. You find work you like, you start a business (I’m not very good at business), you garden and you discover other interests, even cooking! Some of this stuff is very creative stuff. But… Sooner or later that nagging feeling comes knocking from inside. Something is not right. You have abandoned and tried to bury a big part of yourself and it just won’t be ignored…And you know it! In my case I get sarcastic, cranky, impatient and exhausted. Wow, two decades like this? I just always blew it off to PMS. Nope, this eventually has to stop. You can face things, continue on, or now start blaming menopause. What? Just stop being crazy.
Sooo… here I am at 56 years YOUNG and on a new journey of developing my artistic skills. This time facing myself and my God-given gifts with love and compassion all the while learning how to appreciate, play, and enjoy them. Sounds easy right? We should all have such problems. Oh, and lets not forget social media. I’m going to make that #@# fun if it’s the last thing I do! I know so many people out there are like me and want to share their creative growth and achievements. Well here’s to us. We were born with something we were sent here to use and share with others. Let’s feel the power we have in the world.
As I have heard before and believe, progress = happiness.